Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Wow.

I've opened up this post several times over the last couple of weeks, fully intending to finish and publish it...but to no avail. Things have been a bit crazy lately, to the point that I'm not even sure where to start.

When I first started writing this post, on May 12th at 11:28 PM, it had a MUCH more creative title (haha) and began like this:

Roughly an hour ago, I finished my freshman year of college. Let me tell you, it is an aMAZing feeling!! I spaced my finals out so that I only did one per day, but it was still an intense experience that I'm glad to have over with. Very glad, in fact.

The next night, I tried again, changing it to

Roughly twenty-four hours ago, I finished my freshman year...

Obviously, it's not correct now, because twenty-four hours ago, I was still on my way home from an awesome trip to Tennessee and Indiana. My freshman year has been over for almost two weeks now, and I started my summer PHC Euclidean Geometry class last night (after unpacking, responding to a million emails, and practicing piano with a friend for our duet at the recital next week).

So yeah. After some major updating, here's from the original post:

These days, I'm so incredibly grateful for...
...the love and support of my family & friends
...the grace of God
...professors who are (for the most part!) understanding
...what looks to be an improvement in my GPA over last semester [yes!!]
...campaign opportunities
...encouraging and incredibly helpful classmates who organize study chats, briefing discussion boards, and helping me edit my papers
...happy texts that come just when I need them
...a friend who functions as an alarm clock when needed
...my sister Erika, who "helps" me study (by pretending to listen while I explain my notes)
...my mom, who drives to the bank at the drop of a hat when I need to buy plane tickets (haha) and always listens to my papers
...my other little sibs, who mostly stay out of the way while I'm studying (even though I'm at home doing distance learning, they say that they never see me!

I've realized that one of the things that I'll miss the most about distance learning when I go to campus (Fall of 2011) is the artwork in my notebooks. See, my two youngest siblings (ages three and five) love to sit in my room with me and "write" in my notebooks. Later, when I'm taking notes, I'll run across the most hilarious drawings ever. Maybe sometimes I will post some of their pictures...they're just that funny! I've decided that before I go on campus, I will have Josh and Katrina draw some pictures in the notebooks I take, just so that I will have something to laugh at while studying. :)

Actually, I'll miss their encouragement as well. Not only do my siblings stay out of my room during exams (haha), but they also can tell when I'm stressed and tired and will write notes for me. I'm not exactly sure they can tell when I'm wiped out, but maybe it's because I start falling asleep everywhere. Like on my desk. (Yeah, again.) And in the van (Yeah, this time I literally did miss five minutes of my piano lesson because I fell asleep while waiting for my turn). Oh, and I started sleepwalking. Rather embarrassing, because I thought I had outgrown that, but apparently not! So, my siblings write me encouraging notes like this one which I taped to my wall:

Hey Jess, Don't give up on your college. Remember, God loves you. Philippians 4:6: I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

Isn't it sweet? Anyhow, I still have over a year of distance learning left, but I've already started thinking about what I'll miss about being here. (Yet, at the same time, I am incredibly excited about going on campus!)

I'm realizing that this post is already getting quite random and disjointed, but I need to hurry up and finish it so that I can get ready for a live geometry lecture and then a county GOP meeting.

A quick wrap-up of the trip:
-it was a blast.
-campaigning is fun, especially when a certain person is in a hilarious mood that involves non-stop, stream-of-consciousness talking. :P
-Tennessee weather is funky.
-There are a lot of homeschoolers in Indiana. 85 graduated along with my friend Emily at the INHF graduation ceremony. It was pretty cool.
-It's good to be home!


The next week will be rather intense, as I need to locate a job. See, on the drive up to Indiana on Friday, I got an interesting phone call wherein I learned that I no longer have a job this summer. Due to some budget cuts, there isn't enough money to hire me full-time during the summer. So, I am back to looking for a job! Needless to say, I was freaking out about it, knowing that if I can't make a certain amount of money over this summer, I'll need to drop out of PHC. But on Sunday, at Emily's church, the pastor preached from Philippians 4:19 which states, "But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus." It was one of those sermons where you feel like every word is directed at you, and I came away feeling very encouraged. You see, I realized that if God wants me to continue at PHC, He will enable me to earn the money necessary. So many times I try to take things into my own hands, attempting to plan my future and control everything.
But in losing a job that I took for granted, I realized in a rather dramatic way that really, my life is in God's hands, not mine.

Soli Deo Gloria!

7 comments:

Belle said...

"Stream-of-consciousness" huh? Hilarious? Insane, that's me :P

Danielle B. said...

Wow, Jess. Gotta say: Congrats! I know you've put in so much hard work, and I'm encouraged by your post immensely (I've got to get a job if I'm going to PHC next year too!)

Oh, and super congrats for an improvement in GPA! Way to pull it up a notch on your second semester!

I credit you for being able to do another year of Distance Learning...I'm still challenged by your work ethic and dedication.

On a light note: I SO know what you mean by "siblings who say that you don't see them ever" even when you're at home all the time! Hahaha, that is my brothers all over! It's like I'm not here...and yet I'm here ALL THE TIME.

Honestly, sometimes I thought that I would shrivel and burn up if I got out into the sunlight...:-)

Thanks for the Scripture, it's so great to be reminded that god truly *does* know and provide for all our needs richly and abundantly in Christ Jesus.

"Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." - Eph. 3:20-21

Love ya, sister (in Christ!)

Belle said...

It's June now. New month, no post. Just Sayin'
Signed,
-:P

Jess said...

Confession: I publish comments and then forget to respond to them. My bad!

Belle #1: Yes, that's definitely you.

Danielle: Thanks so much! Honestly, I have to say kudos to you for being able to go on campus--for some reason, I'm more worried about whether I'd make it on campus than whether I can do another year of DL! How's the job search going for you? It's amazing how difficult it is to get a job around here, but I think I've finally got one...just waiting on a phone call to confirm. :D Love ya too!

Belle #2: Shockingly enough, you're completely right. I will get on that...

Anonymous said...

If this is "getting on that" we're all in trouble! :)

-You'll never guess who this was, right?

Jess said...

True story. Hmm, maybe I have stuff to write about now... And nope, I'm not sure who you are. But my guess is a sister o' mine. :D

Anonymous said...

Wow, thanks for finally posting again! Now I have something to read finally. I really hope I can actually meet you in real life...somemday. =)